Bill Cosby 32 Most Inspiring Audio Quotes Funny, Success, Relationship, Humor

“ Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you’re pouring, or drinking. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it. ” – Bill Cosby

“ If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up. If you want to be appreciated, shut up. ” – Bill Cosby

“ The very first law in advertising is to avoid the concrete promise and cultivate the delightfully vague. ” – Bill Cosby

“ People can be more forgiving than you can imagine. But you have to forgive yourself. Let go of what’s bitter and move on. ” – Bill Cosby

“ When you graduate from college, they tell you to follow your dreams. Does anyone say you have to wake up first? ” – Bill Cosby

“ The heart of marriage is memories; and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods. ” – Bill Cosby

“ A pelican that is wet walks with a gated limp, and the dry fish swims alone. ” – Bill Cosby

“ I don’t know the key to success. But the key to failure is trying to please everyone. ” – Bill Cosby

“ In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure. ” – Bill Cosby

“ The past is a ghost, the future a dream and all we ever have is now. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Parents are not interested in justice, they’re interested in peace and quiet. ” – Bill Cosby

“ You can turn painful situations around through laughter. If you can find humor in anything, even poverty, you can survive it. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Let us now set forth one of the fundamental truths about marriage: the wife is in charge. ” – Bill Cosby

“ I guess the real reason that my wife and I had children is the same reason that Napoleon had for invading Russia: it seemed like a good idea at the time. ” – Bill Cosby

“ No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I’m not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal. ” – Bill Cosby

“ A grandchild is God’s reward for raising a child. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Gray hair is Gods graffiti. ” – Bill Cosby

“ In spite of the seven thousand books of expert advice, the right way to discipline a child is still a mystery to most fathers and mothers. ” – Bill Cosby

“ A sail boat that sails backwards can never see the sun rise. ” – Bill Cosby

“ When you become senile, you won’t know it. ” – Bill Cosby

“ All Children Have Brain Damage. ” – Bill Cosby

“ There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don’t believe the kids should be given homework. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Sigmund Freud once said, “What do women want?” The only thing I have learned in fifty-two years is that women want men to stop asking dumb questions like that. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy. ” – Bill Cosby

“ When you introduce competition into the public school system, most studies show that schools start to do better when they are competing for students. ” – Bill Cosby

“ You know the only people who are always sure about the proper way to raise children? Those who’ve never had any. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think – in a deeper voice. ” – Bill Cosby

“ Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home. ” – Bill Cosby